There are many forms of guilt, sadness and regret. I'm just learning this. Apparently, I think too much with my head and have forgotten or chosen not to listen to my heart.
Lately I've been feeling guilty about my grandfather's death. I feel bad because I don't feel bad enough. Make sense? I'm more upset over Brian leaving me than I am over my grandfather dying...and that created guilt. However, after much taking and wisdom from those around me - I have found that it's okay.
My grandfather had his first heart attack 10 years ago and my entire family (self included), has been grieving for him since then. Since his passing was a long time in the making, I have had time to think about, contemplate, adjust, and accept it. Where as, Brian's disappearance was sudden, unexpected and much more shocking.
So, although I loved my grandfather a ton, I'm learning that it's okay to be at ease with his death. I don't have to feel sad or guilty. I have no regrets of our relationship and I have no regrets of how I'm handling his death.
